Mummy Short Arms are a small clique of puppy hurters, children pushers and general rotters from Ayrshire in Scotland. If you would like to get involved in their activities then you can send an e-mail from the contact link, attend one of the gigs advertised in the gig section, or start up your own puppy hurting/children pushing franchise in your area.
In no way does this website endorse or condone the antics of these disgusting pricks, it merely serves to document their activities.
A banquet has been served for you all, silver service with all that jazz too. Well when i say banquet i mean a few mp3's a video and sum fetching pictures have been added. If you cant call that a banquet i suggest you eat less, take regular exercise of around 15 minutes a day and eat a high bran cereal.
Mummy Short Arms will be playing a gig at Box in Glasgow on the 30th of April. The gig will mark the 3rd anniversary of their failed attempt to initiate a military coup on the island of Barra, which resulted in mass desertions - in fact, all of the band failed to make it to Barra and carried on with their lives in a pathetic attempt to pretend that there was never a coup planned in the first place. It is free to get in and all are welcome.
Most of those associated with the band will have known this for some time, but today the Department of Beverage Registrations (DBR) finally agreed to recognise Dean's status as a drink. For those of you not in the know, Dean has been engaged in negotiations with the DBR for over 18 months since his successful conversion to a beverage in the winter of 2006. Whilst his new form was apparent for everyone to see however, he was placed in the rather ridiculous position of being forced to wear trousers and shirts rather than the glass he was best suited for. The news will be a welcome surprise for those jetting off to sunny pastures this summer who can now safely enjoy some ice cold Deans by the beach.
Due to a slight mishap (namely Stuart forgetting to renew the hosting for the website and losing half of the pages) the website is now new. Although it is new however, I can assure you that the same brand of professionalism and dedication which characterised the first site will be on display here. I will personally work day and night, sacrificing showers, food and good times to make this a success and if the personal hygiene "bureaucrats" can't handle that then more fool on them.
The inventor of sellotape, Richard G. Drew was not an attractive man, but what he lacked in looks he more than made up for in tape. Defiant to the end, he refused to stick anything with glue and only used blutac with great reluctance. Drew died from injuries sustained during a massive sellotape related accident in 1980.